The other night I had a dream that (now that I think about it) may have told me more about myself than I know. The tl;dr version, I had a dream I was  a prisoner.

In my dream, I find myself wearing ordinary street clothes, I am living in a regular house, but I am aware that I am living in a prison. So I wasn’t sitting behind bars, but still a prisoner. Not just any type of prison Orange is the New Black prison. Which is weird, I haven’t watched OITNB since last summer. But I’m hiding in my van with Piper Chapman (who’s wearing the traditional jumpsuit). A group of people ahead of us just escaped and we are trying to follow their lead. Anyway, we’re trying to escape the prison (which is just my garage). We make it out and I start to panic, realizing we are fugitives I spin the car around to the nearest parking lot to abandon and start running back to the prison on foot. We pass through a weird hotel and I somehow end up back, we jump over the fence and that’s when I woke up.

I’ve never believed in dream interpreting but this one really stands out to me. I’m pretty sure the stress has been getting to me to the point my dreams are affected. As I said, I’ve never dream interpreted but let me try.

I’m a prisoner-Maybe I feel like I am a prisoner to the school I’m in. Or a prisoner in my life. (I’m leaning towards the latter) I’m stuck in this life where I need to please everyone and not fail.

The street clothes- I don’t think this really has any meaning but let me try… I identify myself as a prisoner but haven’t committed a real crime. I’m only taking the place of a prisoner. Unlike Chapman, I can leave prison whenever I want.

The Hotel- Again, its a stretch but I’m going to keep going for the fun of it. People come and go in hotels every time. For most, hotels are havens and a positive place of happiness. I pass through this happiness to head back to the place that gives me stress.

The Panic- I take a chance and drive out of the prison. I didn’t feel free though. I felt like I got pulled into a situation I didn’t want to be in. I didn’t want to be hunted down by the wardens. Even though I know the prison would give me pain, I chose to go back so I wouldn’t be a bother.

Yeah, putting this all together does look a lot like the situations I am currently going through. But I can’t say it’s given me clarity. I feel like I only interpreted something I already know about myself (more or less). Trying to keep this optimistic, perhaps it’s my brain telling me I will know soon enough what I want to do with the rest of my 20 something life.

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